Yesterday at lunch while eating a salad I self served at Harris Teeter I bit the shit out of my tongue. We've all bitten our tongues and it hurts. Usually it just hurts like hell for a while, you suffer through it and then go on with your day. Not me. I bit my tongue so bad that a piece of it hung there like a fleshy flap and my mouth bled all evening. I was afraid that eventually I would get an upset stomach because I was swallowing blood all night and instead of spitting blood I would end up puking blood which is gross no matter what the cause. I showed William the fleshy hanging flap on my tongue and he called it gnarly. Eveyone else I showed it too was merely grossed out. Today at work I cleared a work area by showing my deformed tongue. I think it's healing because I was able to eat a few potato chips and I didn't experience any pain. I can still rub my tongue over my top teeth and it feels like my tongue has a hatch like a submarine or like the plastic top of a gallon milk jug that is connected by a thin hinge of plastic.
The big issue with the tongue injury is whether or not I should take a picture of it and share it with the world here on the blog. William says yes and I am leaning toward maybe. I'm really not sure. On one hand it would be cool because it would be gross. On the other hand it wouldn't be so cool because it'll be gross (not the wound but the tongue in general. A tongue is kinda gross unless it's licking your privates). I'm not asking for feedback since hardly any of you bastards leaves feedback anyway except when Chris pretends to be a 47 year old Hispanic beisbol player. This is an inner dialogue typed out for your enjoyment.