You might have drugs at your command
Riding the bus to work in the morning always is unpredictable. I guess while driving your car to work you can have an encounter with the unexpected but that is more along the line of road rage accompanied by middle fingers and the occasional shoot out. It doesn't have the variability of a bus ride.
This morning when I got on the bus I noticed one of the regular female riders had a strange look on her face. She looked a little troubled but was wearing half a smile across her ample caramel complected maw. I sat down a few seats behind the clump of humanity near the front, broke out my new issuse of Asimov's Science Fiction. I had a CD made for me by my friend, Ingrid, playing. It was a CD I hadn't heard before by a group called Peabody from Australia. It's rawking pub rawk. Good stuff. After a few minutes of reading and jamming I notice that there is more conversation than usual on the bus. A few seats in front of me there is a woman who appears to be in her middle thirties giving the bus driver shit. Sitting next to her is a guy who looks to be in his late forties and he is also giving the driver shit. I take my headphones off and catch snatches of conversation from the woman. He speech is heavily slurred and I can only catch bits of what she is saying. It mostly consists of words like "shooperphizer," "shit," "not takin' thish shit," "bullshit," and some cryptic remark about settling this when we get downtown to the transit center.
When I noticed the guy was giving the driver shit also I got interested. I wasn't going to sit there like a panty waist if he made some move towards the driver. "Let's roll" would by my war cry. If some drugged up fuck is going to crash the bus I am going to get a few licks in before we all die.
I am assuming they were drugged up and not drunk. After a few minutes the woman got disgusted, stood up (her jeans were horrifyingly unzipped) and came back and sat across the aisle from me. She didn't reek of booze so her mind was probably full of crack. After making this observation I put my headphones back on and went back to reading. I heard some slurred speech directed toward me and then saw her pound the seat next to her to get my attention. I took off my headphones and glanced over at her. She said "I shed g'd mornin!" I said back, "mornin." That seemed to sasify her so I went back to reading and jamming. At the next stop her partner bailed. She didn't notice because she was too busy trying to zip up her pants.
Some guy got on at the next stop and she followed him to the back and annoyed him. I think he started lecturing her about her apparent substance abuse problem but that just got her more agitated. Sadly my stop came up soon after and the show for me was over. I am sure she was greeted by security and the transit center and I hope she is enjoying her warm jail-cell bed right now.